Q: Who the hell are you?!
A: It's not that important or really that interesting. I'm a Howard Stern Show fan and a Jason Kaplan superfan. The important thing is that we learn to celebrate the many amazing qualities of Jason Kaplan.
Q: Seriously, you're Jason's mom...right?
A: My favorite conspiracy theory about Jason Kaplan Fan Club. I am not.
Q: Have you ever met Jason Kaplan?
A: No. I'm not really interested in meeting him, and he doesn't want to meet me.
Q: How do you seem to know so much about all things Jason Kaplan?
A: I collate a variety of sources.
Q: Do you live in your mom's basement?
Q: Is there really a "prize closet"?
A: It's actually just a corner of room. Let's just call it "theater of the mind".